Mental health can drive you mad…and the people around you. Its taken me 15 years to kinda understand what bipolar depression is. Extreme highs and lows that come and go with little warning. When it sets in it can feel like a runaway train or can make you feel like your in a hole and can never get out. My wife of 10 years battled this and she likes to say now that we would still be together if she had gotten help sooner. She’s now on a cocktail of pills that keep her more in the middle zone and knock her out out at night. She has also done alot of sessions with a therapist to deal with all of lifes problems. I’m still the one she calls when her life gets really hard and I do a good job of listening and usually calm her down within 10 minutes of talking. If its real bad she goes to the hospital and for a couple of days she gets a break from life’s stresses and they readjust her medicines.
If you know somebody that has issues dealing with life it is important to get that person help whether they want it or not. This is the line that I draw now. To many times it is not dealt with and it’s easy to just to say that “they will be fine” knowing that the problem will be back in the near future and may very well end in suicide. Best thing you can do is check them into a hospital and get profesional help. I can also say talking alone cannot fix all problems. …a chemical imbalance needs pills to correct properly.
recently seen an old x-friend of these forums turn paranoid delusional/ megalomaniacal from simply weed and alcohol and ended up naked and in handcuffs. He likely was predisposed but for sure the drugs brought it out. I’m not saying more about it but stay in tune to signs within urself or others
Weed will fuck the shit out of people who are predisposed to schizophrenia/schizoaffective/psychosis. Wish more people were aware. I’ll touch a lot of fuckn drugs but weed I will not.
As someone who uses Marijuana for recreational and and medical purposes, I’d like to share an experience.
I watched my best friend in high school go paranoid from a bad weed experience. He has an identical twin brother who was always smoking with us as well. We’d been smoking for years and never had any issues, weirdness, or other… Just kids being kids in a garage.
One day I got some bud from a dude and one of the nugs was a clearly different color from the rest. He pointed out how weird it was but it was still a green Marijuana nugget, not a red mystery plant. We smoked through the whole bag over a week or so per usual and carried on
Twin 1 was acting completely normal but twin 2 started getting more and more paranoid by the day. He thought the one greener nug was laced or something even though the rest of us felt nothing different at the time or later. He kept thinking our friend group was talking about him no matter how much all of us reassured him that we loved him and that he was fine. He eventually had a breakdown in class right in front of me and went fully catatonic and nonresponsive. He hasn’t been the same since and his relationship with his own brother is quite strained still.
Even in a scientifically-as-close-as-can-be 1:1 scenario where both twins had been smoking the same stuff in the same quantity, for the same amount of time, one had a very different experience. Personally, I know with 99.9% confidence it wasn’t laced because we 3 shared bud at that time and only smoked it together. I did a fair amount of drugs at that point and would have known if something was off. I don’t think it was necessarily the weed that did it but the thought that something foreign and strange to him had invaded his body and changed him.
Even if you’re fine and think everyone else should be fine too, they might not be.
Took me about 6 mos of therapy to figure out that I’m not depressed, it’s just that I had very much neglected myself. Mostly due to harmful work habits.
It’s really heartening reading about everyone’s brushes with mental health issues to help me feel like my family’s struggles, while significant, are not unique or strange or even necessarily a negative thing. Imo, mental illness touches everyone in their lives at one time or another. Some of us are more prone to serious and chronic struggles but all of us can identify.
These last 2 years have done a number on all hoomans. I know so many people coping w addiction who have relapsed, friends who have never taken an SSRI in their lives finding themselves on drugs for the first time in their lives as adults.
Having 2 young kids would’ve been a shit show in a normal world. Through the paradigm of protracted lock downs, schools closing, the media sensationalizing the virus, it has been an utter shit show. Thank God for Esk8. Nothing gets rid of the blues like a skate around the city on a sunny day. Keep on truckin friends. 
Yo word. I have ADHD bad. Maybe bipolar. And I been hated on Fing hard man. I’m sorry I reacted capriciously at times. I truly love the build. All of em not just boards. And am a seriously skilled craftsman with many tools at my disposal and years of workflow experience in many different forms and trades and skills. I also can play ALOT of instruments for some reason reasonably well. I visualize things. Know modeling software decently. Programming cncs awesome. Well 3 axis. Sorry for any misunderstandings. Glad this is hear explains much. Sorry guys doesn’t make up for boorish behavior on the forum. For that I apologize. Cheers.
Did some boarding today at Valmont bike park with the kiddo. Was nice. She scared to ride the eBoard still. Lol. All good. Someday. Someday!. 
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If anyone near wanna ride I’m down. Got my kiddo for now as ride buddy. Be nice to open the board up a bit more with a crew. . Behind wonderland lake is this sick uphill 90° hairpin dirt trail. And I beasties it twice. Bout 3-400’ total up. Maybe 5 idk steep though. Was surprised I made it. (Held bottom of board and was on two wheels to do it. ). Awesome trail. Fun stuff.
I’m super sorry to hear that. I feel for you man. Nobody should be hated for being different.
Do you guys ever get jelly legs or crazy anxiety manifesting in your legs?
Once or twice in my life it was like an uncontrollable tremor in one of my legs.
Recently it will only happen for my after work commute in the form of my legs feeling weak or restless or second guessing their position on the board.
My return trip route home has some pretty sketch roads in one way or another and It’s pretty much the only route due to the LA river, rail ways and heavy industry.
So far my only crashes have been on the way home from work and even though I’ve remedied the causes my subconscious is sketched.
For reals I literally had never touched electronics in my life. And I taught myself everything about these things in three years. Everything. Alone. So If peeps hating it don’t even matter. I’ve accomplished more alone under ridiculous life constraints no one has to deal with simultaneously. It blows my mind that having money is all anyone cares about. Because without other minds creating the money won’t do a damn thing. Except give you Dunning Krueger syndrome. 
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I haven’t been on forums in months. Do you guys think I got worse or better at building…
I get jelly legs a lot but I can usually just ride it out, or it’ll go away after a few rides.
I had unsuspected inattentive ADHD for most of my life and it just seemed like im ‘broken’ piece of human most of my life…
When u find out there’s a whole plethora of ppl feeling the same, it becomes a lot easier to digest it and “accept yourself”
Ya ADHD is a bitch. Do you exercise? Only thing that makes my brain work properly is vigourous activity. Lifting weights and hockey in particular are vital.
I would just like to share my experience with mental issues. Years ago I had a couple of my first and only anxiety or panic attacks. I was accussed of something I honestly did not do at my job that I had been at for 10 years, planned to be at for another 15 years at least and had relocated for. My union did shit for me because they are lazy and I royally got fucked but not fired. Still fighting this 10 years later.
These attacks royally sucked and were scary. I found out after people will go to the hospital for attacks like these, I probably would have if I’ve known. I felt like jumping out of my skin, my mind consummed with what happened to me and unable to shake these thoughts no matter how hard I tried. I actually lost my wallet because of it. Big adrenalin rush, felt like punching holes in the walls and just could not sit still. It was way beyond being pissed off. I could see how feeling this way for very long or often could really mess someone up or make someone do something stupid to prove a point. I just want to say if anyone ever feels like this it will pass. Please talk with someone a friend or family and or seek help. Go to a hospital and get some happy pills, you would certainly not be the first and nothing to be ashamed about. I could imagine different circumstances that could lead to attacks like I had. It was no fun at the time but thankfully they passed. I felt nobody could know how I feel, they are not in my shoes but there are people who absolutely understand. Attacks like these are more common then I realized.
Please stay strong! Life can be a bitch at times but still much better standing up then laying down. It may take some time but things will always get better even if it does not feel like it at the moment.
How do you peeps not loose your life spirit?
AirTag
All joking aside…being able to find a way to inject humor (where not inappropriate) is critical to keeping my sanity and drive. Laughing off things, or at least laughing at how screwed I sometimes am, is so important. Merely the physical act of laughing or a huge smile can improve my mood. It doesn’t change the situation I’m in but it can change how I feel about it and, for me, that’s half the battle and helps gives me the drive to win the other half.
If you’re in a tough spot right now I hope that changes soon and you find the ways you can hold onto your drive and spirit. We’ll always be here to lend support. 
Esk8, stay busy, don’t give your mind the opportunity to think negatively. Boredom leads to depression for me so I try to always be occupied.